One

Single. .Uno. . Solo. . Alone. . Seems to be the latest trend that I’ve had to endure. .defend. .live. . Own! Its been a minute since I’ve put my whole heart in it. Cause 9 times out of 10 my soul is the sole soul solely committed. I’ve become bitter. I admit it. . But Shit it. . Has to be some, one sweetheart to turn turn this sour patch kid’s heart less tart. I don’t wanna be some old heartless fart without a hope for a happy ending because I never the chance at a steady start.. .They say slow and steady wins the race. Be Patient just wait. . If that’s true. Then my unofficial motto is cash! You know the cliche “The nice guys always finish last” . . Lets do the math. . If I’m in a race. . And I’m going the slowest. . Moving at a steady pace. . Never extending my stride, keeping the competition in front, seldom at my side. . Allowing him the be first across the line giving him access to my prize. That would in turn make me last! Love doesn’t have a second place. Just First Loves and all the heartbreaks that follow. So Single. .Uno. . Solo. . Alone. . Will be the latest trend that I’ll continue to endure. .defend. .live. . Own! Until I found that Single person to be my Uno Amor who would never stoop so lo to make me Endure lonely nights, Defend my feelings, or Live without love. . On my Own!

The Game of Memory

Usually when I close my eyes all I see is darkness but tonight. . I see all These. . Colorful images, relive and reminisce recall that. remember this. Millions of Memories in the abyss. Just a bottomless pitt full of Shit. And no matter the morale I just sit and sift through the Shit. Because no matter what you do it ain no changing the past, i mean you done lived through the Shit but you can't let your future be influenced by the past that you had. Now I completely understand what the old heads were saying when they were telling me the game and slippin candy in my hand. Hold on to the memories cause they're all you'll have. Nothing last forever. We all will past!

Here I Stand: The Invisible Man.

Here I stand, hollow and transparent. . A process inherent of neglect from my DamN parents. . One left because of the other, and with the other being my mother, I can completely understand now why the separation had been done. . And once the other, meaning mother, start realizing I was calling another woman Momma, then came the drama, cause over years and years of gaining siblings without my mother being a Momma. . I had a couple different families on a couple different corners all together that gave me a few different Mommas. . Anyways jealousy kicks in but its not in the form of "I wanna fit in" but in forms of "you can just get out, if they love you like you love them they'll lend you their couch". . At first I was just "Ouch" but then I thought about it again. . To some i'm more family than A friend so i'll always have a place to sleep no matter how the story ends. . Now lets take our focus further in to where my hollow heart lies and my sorrow never dies. .Do you know the feeling in children when they don't even feel adequate comfort to tell their mother of any certain, sudden discomfort. . Or any feeling for that matter. . Well thats my life on a plastic platter. . Feelings of abandonment, acting out for punishment, just wanted some acknowledgement. It all seemed to never really matter. . Nothing positive. Just negative chatter. . Even stooping as low as to tell an former classmate nothing bout my worst when I was at my lowest. .She's the main reason I don't belive "I promise" so If i've made one to you and broke it I apologize, I promise. . Speaking of that you don't wanna hear how bad my prom was. . How sad my Mom was cause of how Mad her son was. .I guess that's what the feeling of guilt does. . Most people have a trust issue. .I unsubscribed a long time ago. Tired of reading all the same ads & articles. Promising me the same Shit they've been promising you, whew. . Now that you know partly why I am the way I am. .now matter how strong I stand. . Here I still Stand: The Invisible Man.

Untitled

I can see you. . I can smell your fragrance. . I can enjoy the sound of your voice. . So really. .I can behold your beauty but I can't hold you. . . Maybe I should just come to my senses because you got my mental going haywire and a hold on 3 out of 5 of my senses. . Its a shame I can't make you my misses. . Cause I'd have a hold on at least 1 out of 5 of your senses with just one taste my kisses. . So close yet so far away, how can one be so far yet get closer by the day. . I got my hopes up so high that they're bound to fly away so i'll keep it on a kite string until the way I feel fades away

The Process Continues...

So I was thinking. . Maybe we can get aquainted. Start out with conversation and graduate to penetration. . Of the mind. Cause its times when we only scratch the surface & try to build something without first laying a foundation, but when the structure falls in devastation. We wanna blame it on each other instead of looking in the mirror. . So if its ok with you, lets avoid that situation. I wanna build something steady, but only when WE'RE ready. I learned from trail and error. . But one can't dwell on their trails forever. So personally. . I think its now or never. Lets make it happen. Correction. Just let it happen, Life's a Trip, God's the captain, We just hitched a ride. I'm kinda sorta thinking it'll be smoother with you by my side. Ha. Now i'm running lines, but they're filled with truths. Don't want to bank on word? Then i'll show you. Trust in what I do, & then what I say.
You can't control time nor you heart's mind. Love can come with quickness & stop on a dime!

The Zone

Now usually "in The zone" is where I wanna be. I mean, the Zone is obviously where it at! For example 9 times out of 10 when you're in the Red Zone you score, even then you've made it to the End Zone. Yay! Touchdown. . Hmph. Now it's one Zone that everybody, all shapes, sizes, sexes, and skintones have found themselves stuck in. . Drumroll please. . THE FRIENDZONE! DamN now that has to be Mentally and Emotionally the worst place to be. BFF doesn't compare to BF&GF. . At all, but go hand in hand, what a bittersweet contradiction. A conflict of interest where interest is the conflict. One party wants more and the other has not a lick! But really, how much sense does this make? " We're just too good of friends to ever go on a date! I mean my heart would just break if our friendship was ever at stake"I guess i'm the only one that feels that risk is one we could take. Don't think i'm being insensitive until you hear my take. To any type of relationship. . Friends has to be the first step you make, if you're not a friend to your lover then that love won't make. . It! Well they say it's to each own. . And DamN that Zone got me in my zone, thoughts on top of thoughts free falling from my dome. now I wonder if I should let my friend read this when I done?

(143) LNG-DIST

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All we have are the good morning text and the late night talks. . How I long for a goodbye kiss and the mid-day walks. . Hours of conversation don't begin to compare to just seconds in your presence. .What I wouldn't do for a session of caressing And I love all the pictures I receive that timeline your day but just one photograph of us would be something I could cherish for the rest of my days. . When I say I miss you, I do miss you. . But can I really miss you if I'm never really with you? Words can only do so much but You can read my actions like a scripture. . If I only had one wish I'd have here in a instance, but until then I guess. . I'll just love you from a Distance

MY P.S.A (PERSONAL SITUATION ANALYZED)

So I guess "You are what you eat!" applies more to life than we think. . If you are fed lies are your life then most likely your going to live a life of lies. . So with us living in a generation of broken homes. . Bad father figures. . Etc. Wouldn't that making it harder on the males to actually be a "Man"? I've learn from my life experiences that can't let the factors in life that i have no control over have control over my life. . I learned it late in the game but a 4th quarter comeback is better than no comeback at all. . I've come to realize also that a man is going to be a man. . His own man yet the man his environment molded him to be. . Friend of mine called me on my Shit. . I've said it plenty times but never thought about if I was practicing what I’d been preaching. . "You attract what you present" . . I have made many statements "complaining" about the ways and the thought pattern of a woman. . When I should have checked myself on the same things i spoke on

So Now I guess if I looked passed the ass I would see the class and everything I every wanted... needed to make things last.. eyes so cute but is her mind acute.. Sharp, intelligent, and quick with wits.. or is she just a sexy slim with nice tits.. so yes I have overlooked the good willed one for the good looking one.. Who hasn't? It’s just a mistake made and a lesson learned.. Respect, trust, and love is earned.. so I need to be.. and I am prepared to put in work & not try to work my way into her skirt..
I was told that I’m just like other guys.. I simply reply not I; don't take my word for it. . let my actions show for me. So you can see just what I’m all about.. so the question I ask is this.. How is my presentation?. . Does it keep your attention?.. What does my first impression say to you? Is it lasting.. or are you wondering how long is this going to last...I can only be the BEST MAN I know how to be.. although there is always room for improvement.. Now I must ask myself….. If nobody notices my problems will they ever be solved??

PSA

So. . Yeah i've just come to the conclusion that all the good women are gone. . Don't ever leave home. . Or maybe just dumb. .
She'll ask for something different but when different appears she flat foot overlooks it based on the thoughts of her friends. .
Although its her happiness not theirs in the end, and she just ends up all alone back with her friends in the end. .
When will the trend of this end. . We lookin for the Real Women. .Yall yellin drought of Real Men. If you search google for a "NIGGA" thats the result you recieve so apply that search bar to life and look for "The man that i need" or "The man just for me". .
But you must redefine ya self before the search can proceed. . You attract what you present. So be Lady like please. .Cross ya legs at ya knees. Make a Man put in work. . Nobody wants it wit ease. . Cause if it was easy for me, then it was easy for him. .
Good Women heed what i'm sayin, cause you know its the truth. .
You say you lookin for love but you only lookin in coops. . Or niggas Ralph Laurened out from the hat to the boots. . Love is far materialistic. . Come on we gotta be realistic. . Money's the root of all evil so you loving the Devil in Ed Hardy. . Don't get me wrong i never said We Good Men couldn't Swagg out but don't just wanna be wit a dude because he pop his trunk pullin bags out. .
The Nice Guy's always last out because he ain cursin you women out. . Don't mind takin yo ass out, show you a good time . . You want somebody raisein they hand up. . Destroyin yo fuckin mind. . You know "don't give yo heart to the one that actually wants to spend quality time". . I could speak on this all day but it would be a waste of God Given time. .
Just call me when you want some real. . Nah just keep ya number, i'll just give you mine

MisMysterious

You say your MisUnderstood but to me your just….
Ms. Mysterious..
Ma’m i hope you reading this
The things you do Intriege.. Have me at the edge of my seat like “I ain missin this!”
It’s something about you that keeps me wanting more
your so far from easy that its getting harder and harder to let you go
i’m down for a challenge but i ain aiming for below
i’m focused top left… you know the center of blood flow

You say your MisUnderstood but to me your just….
Mz. Mysterious..
I know your sick of hearing this but
I’m different from the others.. not ya ordinary lover
I’m the type you’d take to Mother..i’ll click with daddy and ya brothers
I’m the type to shower you wit flowers.. call you after hours..
and I ain gotta mess up and need to kiss up before i pick the phone up
just to see how you doin..whats on your mind is what i wanna know

You say your MisUnderstood but to me your just….
Miss Mysterious…
Ma I KNOW you gon be feeling this
I haven’t had time to tell you .. so i just made a list
and it reads as Follows: your smiles magically “attractive” i swear you “bewitching” i’m poetic and your “angelic” so “elegant” with a body so “enticing”
Intelligence so fascinatingg Your future seems so glamorous i’m hopin it includes me cause your presence and your voice in my ear oh so “lovely”
such a “sweet” something breath”taking” and so “tempting” in Mind Body and Soul you “beautiful”
not just “good-looking” close to “ravishing” and your so “stunning” thats your “pulchritudinous”.. so ridiculous. that wasnt even in my vocab but i looked it up JUST for this occasion!

You say your MisUnderstood but to me your just….
MisMysterious
This section is for all the future Mysteries you will present me with
all the clues you will or will not include..
This section is for all the Questions i have for you that will be halfway answered verbally
and fully expressed thru your actions..
This section is……
The Mystery continues

You Made A Brotha Fall Hard

Damn Ma...you made a brother fall
Harder, faster than I can ever recall

You know that day I held your hand
I felt a connection so strong
Thinking tough before I spoke
Didn’t say anything wrong

Early morning, mid day, late night
Anytime that you call
No matter what your reason
I’m bound to run to the phone

Homies say that I’m sprung
I’ve just been searching so long
Now that I’ve found me a angel
Sorry God but, I can’t let her go home

My attention’s all gone because it’s focused on you. . Writing poem after poem my inspiration is you

from the word that you speak
To your pretty little peepers
From the smile on your face
To your choice in style of sneakers

It’s all the small things
That you do and you say
Like I how I know that you’re flirting
When you fiddle your hair

Can’t help but Love it, the way you make me feel anytime that you’re near... & when you leave the thought of you remains so you’ll always be here

So here I stand as a man.
To request for a chance

Not to put a ring on your hand
But to show you a Man

I couldn’t look in your eyes
And find the the courage inside
To recite what I write
So I wrote you just scribe

No need to reply just read it,
my feelings are listed inside!

Smile

First off. I want to thank god for giving 32 reasons to call you beautiful and hiding then behind your face. . From your incisors to your divine canines, all the way back to the possibility of wisdom. . I love your smile and every tooth that’s used to form it. . Especially that sweet tooth that gave you the taste for this chocolate. . Pearly whites. . What a great topic. . A smile can tell you so much. . From the face of a ecstatic fanatic to the face of a proud parent. . The smile has to be the best invented action of emotion on the planet. Its even the difference of her loving your touch and "your touching too much" . . The grin on a child's face on their very first Christmas, i don't remember mine so I can't wait until the day I get to witness. . A smile in its self says a million plus words. . So paired with a picture, a poem, or a verse. . It has to be the most valuable priceless possession on earth. .

Save Me

Who's there for superman when his head is hanging low. . When he's no longer flying high & his feet are concret on the ground. . Where is his savior when he cries out for much needed help and company. . What is he to do when he finds himself stuck between his personal kryptonite and his arch-enemies. . I bet you're wondering Why someone who seems so indestructible and proves to be the ultimate problem solver needs some one to come save him. . Well truth is everybody needs a Hero. . Even me!

Rainy Night

"As the rain starts to drain from the roof to the pains all the pain I’ve obtained seems to follow that drain tears and sorrow closely follow and content settles in...
As her scent lingers in... And our hands intertwine there’s a pause left in time. .at this moment, at this time, she’s the only thought on my mind...
To be closer is my focus and I’m on the right course. .flashes of lightning are our lighting plus the candles I have lit... as we cuddle it’s like a huddle we lay and talk about future plans... we get lost in conversation
I run my fingers through her hair.. She lays her head on my chest. She says she’s most comfortable there
into the darkness we stare. Like there’s something up there. . ."

Window Shop(her)

"As I walk pass..
I see her instead of my reflection in the glass
Looking so ravishing, standing like a mannequin, with skin like a African, Porcellian,.. Doll
plus eyes that should come with a map just in case you get lost
This is a human being and I'm window shoppin like this woman gota price tag..
and in the back of my mind i'm wondering what she cost!
Mesmerized by her looks.. Enticed by her walk.. I had to explore her mind.. we had to have a talk!
But how would i approach her.. throat in knots like a choaker.. confedience like Songz and a brotha still choaked up! let me Hook my game face up.. make sure my clothes fitting right.. fresh breath before I face her. peppermint Shot and a Trident chaser.. can't take any chances I'm trying impress her,
I check my waves.. pump my lil chest up.. prepare myself for battle.. like she the champ and i'm next up!
In my head the bell rings as I step over the velvet rope! I walk thru the Double doors and set my eyes on a ceratin coat.. that just happend to be in a closer proximety so i culd get a closer look. . caught her attention for her opinion on how this shirt would look..Like a normal man turn common thief I stole a look..she had curves like a bottle..
leg defination not found in any book.. So i went in full throttle.. full speed ahead.. Asked her about the dressing room, she cut her eyes; tilted her head"

The End

"Welcome to the End of what could have been where you look back on what you did and imagine how it would have been. . Or How it should have been. . If you knew the out come, the right thing, would you do it then? At the time when it mattered most, Was it so hard to do it then? Welcome to the End of what could have been where you look back on what you did and imagine how it would have been. . Or How it should have been. . If you would have known the result of the conversation on that day, would you say anything different. .find a better message to relay? Would you choose to bite your tongue or speak your mind and be done Welcome to the End of what could have been where you look back on what you did and imagine how it would have been. . Or How it should have been. . If you knew that you were the only person they wanted would you make moves with the upt most precision, be everything they envisioned, to influence their decision
. .I've made my way to the End of what could have been all I can do is look back on what I did and imagine how it should be. .Well How it would be if I had of went with my 2nd not my 1st mind the head on my shoulders not the one below my waist line. . Should have Thought about the future instead of letting the past control my life line, don't know if I said was wrong. . But I know I said it at the wrong time. . Its 3 strikes and your out; I got 6 & still used all mine. .I Had a patient pitcher. . At one point I was the final stroke to a perfect picture, but in the end it wasn't nearly as perfect as the artist pictured. . So I'd like to Welcome you to the End of what could have been where we can look back on what I did and you can perceive how it would have been. . Well how it should be"